First Person
10,950 Days and Counting
Dear Kay,
It rained on May 12, 1990. Years later, people still come up to me and say things like, “Your wedding was great. Man, it rained.”
I was told that rain on a wedding day was good luck. At the time, I was glad to hear that the heavens were giving us a boost—I’m not superstitious, though this was a day when I wore something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue. Couldn’t hurt, might help.
We’ve been through plenty of life together—I’ve known Jon since 1980, when he stood up at assembly and delivered the week’s announcements in a perfect imitation of the head of the high school, clipboard and all. The head of the high school loved it, and so did I.
Forty years have passed, and here we are.
Sunday night—Mother’s Day—we were in the back yard, grilling pizza with son David and Jameson, who had just arrived in Nashville after a months-long quarantine in Boston, then Monteagle, Tennessee. Jameson pulled out her quarts of sourdough pizza dough, light as air, puffy beyond belief. She looked through the trees, and told us to look up: the sky had turned lavender. A pale, strange color. It shifted through purple, pink, then gray, a sight to see through the bright green of the new leaves.
My mom used to talk about that time of day when the sun is low, and the world glows. “Technicolor time,” she called it. She would have loved this particular evening.
They add up, these days, in a spectacular montage—for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, just like our vows said.
It was a good day, our wedding, but it wasn’t the best day of our marriage. I guess maybe today’s the best day, as I think about it. We keep getting days, one after another. As we all sit here in the midst of a world turned upside down, each day has become an extraordinary combination of rare and mundane. “We get to have another day,” I say to Jon pretty often.
Love,
Ann
Loved this letter and thank you for sharing it. I love the idea of treasuring these days and considering them the gift that they are.
Love this letter. Thank you.
Well said. Priceless.
Beautiful tribute to life days shared.
Happy Anniversary. Sending you all so much love today. Not that I think you need it but like you said, it can’t hurt.
Thank you for this, dear Ann <3
Thank you for sharing and sending out your joy through the whole universe!
Beautiful words! It’s so good to hear someone who really appreciates their partner. I married the love of my life in 1978, but I lost him last Christmas. Mercifully he was only ill for s few weeks, but I miss him so very much, and would give anything for one more wedding anniversary. Cherish the moments, and enjoy your family. Here in England we’re still in lockdown, so I can’t even hug my children and grandchildren, and that makes it all so hard. I will celebrate my husband’s birthday alone this week. It rained on our wedding day too, so maybe there’s something in the old superstition after all!
Condolences on your loss. I hope it will soon be safe to hug your children and grandchildren, but meanwhile, I hope your husband’s memory will always be a blessing and a balm for your heart.
I am sending you a virtual hug across the miles. I too lost my “Big Love” far too soon. This current state of required isolation does not help the feeling of loss and loneliness. I find much solace in the knowledge that my husband and I shared a beautiful and precious union. There are many that never experience that with longevity throughout their married lives. We found that what started as an incredible bond and love continued to grow. I am so very grateful to have experienced such joy.
I had mine for 14105 days and he has been gone for 1500.
It’s good to see that someone else cherishes the goodness of the days together. I hope that you made many more days in the future. Take not a one for granted!!!!! Hugs
HaPpY AnNiVeRsARy! Ours was last week.
✨✨
Beautiful story built upon beautiful family days. Hope you have many more lavender-filled sunsets.
We too were married in May, two weeks before it snowed several inches. I think it brought us luck. When I tell people that we are about to celebrate our 43rd anniversary, they look at me and wonder why I married at such a young age. No reason, just love. We have been through a lot and as I read each day about the many who are dying too young and too quickly I fear about what if it happens to one of us. There is something about love that survives a long time it does not die with the body.
Happy Anniversary. May we both have many more to celebrate.
Happy Anniversary! So thankful we are for the many blessings we have in our lives.
Happy Anniversary! I also have been with my high school sweet heart since 1980, but we married in 1985. Life continues to get sweeter!
Happy anniversary. True love abides.
This is lovely, Ann. Happy anniversary!
❤
Happy Anniversary! What a sweet letter. We were married in 1990 as well. Seems like a century ago, and yet not.
Beautiful.
What a lovely piece you shared. Thank you for starting my day with this ! And I “get to have another day”! Blessings to you from .PA.
So beautiful! Thank you.
Happy Anniversary! What a sweet letter, and what a great way to spend your special day. We were married in 1970, so we’re creeping (or is it galloping? I cannot keep track of the days anymore!) up on our 50th in November. I wouldn’t have spent it with anyone else, and I hope and pray that we make it to the big day…wearing our masks, washing our hands, and not touching our faces! It’s become a surreal world.
Beautiful! May you enjoy many more years together.
Such a wonderful letter – thanks for sharing. ❤️
Happy Anniversary! What a lovely tribute to your marriage!
What a beautiful tribute to your anniversary. May you have many more!
Happy, happy anniversary. What a beautiful post.
Happy anniversary! May all your days together be golden. Thank you for sharing when parties aren’t possible.
We keep getting days. Love this.
Happy Anniversary Ann.
Happy Anniversary and many more days together. I married my soul-mate January 1, 2000. It was the second for both of us. We had known each other as people who work in a university do, but never crossed paths off campus. Both of our spouses decided independently to leave home. Jim had already relocated to a university in Georgia, and we had been keeping in very casual touch because we were playing with that new-fangled thing called email. Fate intervened and we both ended up in Boston, 2 different conferences that overlapped by one day, same hotel. We had our first meal together. And the universe shifted, planets altered their orbits, and we knew that evening. After several years, he retired from the school in Georgia, moved here (Louisiana) and we married. In true techie fashion we picked “Y2K Day” because so many people were irrational about it. And we were blissfully happy. Pancreatic cancer took him very quickly before our 18th anniversary. I miss him every day and have found comfort in knitting and travel, which gets me away from my usual haunts. Having a son in London is a boon…It is giving me some new haunts. And I am the only person in my neighborhood with a Loop London frequent shopper card.
Loop London! I love it! Haven’t been to the store in person, but ordered a kit from them that came beautifully packaged via Royal Mail! Enjoy your family and London!
Such incredibly sweet words, these. Happy anniversary to you & best wishes for many more simple, happy & healthy days together.
Happy Anniversary. Thank you for sharing this beautiful post with us… May you have another 10,950 days more…
Beautiful letter. Thank you for the reminder
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!❤️
May you both have very many more days….
Lovely.
Ann, thank you from the bottom of my heartstrings for this beautiful letter. It lifted me out of a weeks-long funk and helped me remember what’s Really Important — my sweetie and the wonderful life we have built together. We celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary (second marriage for both of us) with a trip to Norway last summer.
Happy Anniversary!!!
Congratulations!! Thank you for sharing and I loved your comments.
You sure does know how to string those there words. Oh, happiest of anniversaries to yaz.
Lovely words in a testament to your marriage and what you have put into it. My husband is a minister and counsels those he will marry. A most important statement is ‘this is not the happiest or best day of your life…it is one of many you will have’. (And the other crucial question…how and where will you spend the holidays?) Congratulations!
Beautiful,Congratulations,Blessings, it’s not 50-50. We are going on 62 yrs on our 60th we had a big snow storm. I think 13 people ventured out. We send cake home with all who would take it. Still in love.
Grilling pizza???
Happy anniversary, Ann! Also my anniversary today – we tend to say “let’s do another X years” to eachother, but I like your days perspective. It also rained on May 12 in Denmark in 2007!
Crying as you have been SO fortunate
So beautifully expressed and you words are particularly fine for a couple that has been married almost 55 years, that’s us!
“We get to have another day” is perhaps the most beautiful tribute to a marriage I have read. Happy Anniversary, you two! Your lovely writing reminds me of your father’s. Learning of his books here, I’ve read Sketches of a Small Town and hope to read more. This father and daughter have the gift of poignant descriptions. Grateful!
I’ve always loved the word “gloaming” for that time of day.
Happy anniversary! It was my parents’ anniversary as well, and it rained 58 years ago in Milwaukee too.
“We get to have another day” ❤️
Aww. Your last paragraph made me well up! Happy anniversary Ann and John <3
Anytime I spoke to my much-beloved Gram and asked her about her day, she would reply, “I woke up today.I get to have another one, and I choose to make it a good one.”
God, I miss her so much.
Thank you for sharing, reading it brought tears to my eyes. I pray for serenity for all those folks that are suffering, for whatever reason, during this pandemic time. And am grateful for my marriage and getting one more day.
Technicolor Hour. Yes.
Thanks Ann. These words are very comforting as my daughter was to be married this Saturday but because of COVID and our state is still “shelter in place”, the wedding has been moved to late September. I know that will be the best day until the next best day and the next. 🙂
Congratulations and happy anniversary! Thirty years happen one day at a time – here’s to more rainy days, rainbow days, and technicolor skies!
Beautifully said Ann. Brought a lump to my throat. Happy Anniversary
What a sweet tribute to the exquisite mundane and “getting to have another day” together. My husband and I just had our 200th “Lunaversary” as we married later and won’t likely reach a 50th or 60th anniversary. He also returned from having cardiac arrest two years ago so we end each day thanking each other for the day and asking for another.
Happy Anniversary, Ann! Your gift of words is so poignant, wish I could communicate half so well. Love love love your words and thoughts. So lucky you got to have your sons attend as well. Here’s to “one more day”….
Happy 30th! I got married on that day too. Thirty years and three kids later, we still like each other!
Absolutely lovely! Thank you!
I’m with the guy I liked in High School too! What a wonderful time we have had, every day is an adventure. Such good times!
“Today is the best day.”
Many more of these for you two.
Sorry I’m so late with my anniversary congratulations, Ann – but wishing a very happy This Day to you both 🙂
Loved this post – you write with such detail, and I felt I was almost there, experiencing the same. Its been nearly 17,000 for us, and I’m grateful for those very special moments, too, especially with everything going on right now. We married in May, too – a beautiful month for a wedding. A late Happy Anniversary wish to you!